Brandon Moon

Well… I did it. I made it to the end of my 30 day challenge. And quite frankly… I’m amazed I made it this far. There were a few times I almost gave up. And there were a few times I struggled to get a post out that day. But here I am, at the end, having completed it… and it feels good!

The more important part, however, is what I learned from this experience:

1. I learned that I actually have a little bit of talent at this. I’ve been surprised by the number of people who have expressed appreciation for and interest in my writing. Is my style perfect? No. Do I have awesome structure to my posts? No. But at least I can communicate my ideas (at least somewhat clearly). And it’s helped me to appreciate my own writing a lot more than before.

2. I learned that there is so much to say, and so few people who care. This may seem contrary to the last post, but let me explain. While I truly appreciate the people who read my blog (that means you), I know that compared with the readership of a lot of other blogs out there, mine is in the minority. I’d be willing to wage, however, that most of you have a blog of your own. Maybe you don’t post much on it, maybe you do, but either way, most of us are generating content online. Amazing amounts of content, really. And sometimes I wonder… are we generating more content than we can consume? I can’t possibly keep up with everything out there that’s being published online every day… nobody can. So why do we get upset when so few people pay attention to what we write? It’s a funny conundrum.

3. Some topics are more controversial than others. My apple posts and my Harry Potter post drew a lot of attention. Yet others, such as my posts about Tasha didn’t seem to draw much attention. I find this a little sad, really, that we express more interest in things of less significance, and less interest in the more meaningful things. It’s not that I don’t doubt you read them, and maybe you really did appreciate them, but I didn’t always see it (though I did see it from my wife—love you honey!).

4. It’s hard to come up with something interesting to post about every day! I’ll admit, a lot of those posts I didn’t spend a ton of time on, and they were kind of grudgingly finished. I also learned that if I open my eyes, I can find something interesting to post about fairly often. And I definitely enjoy posting about something I’m interested in much more than posting about less interesting things.

I’ve enjoyed my adventure. Now it’s time to think up another 30 day challenge!

(Also, this is my 100th post on this blog. How’s that for awesome timing?)

Picture yourself back in your dating years. You meet this cute, fun, attractive girl or boy and start going out. Things are going well for a while, but then they lose interest and break up with you (Sad story, I know, but… keep reading). You call, you try to change his or her mind, but it looks like things aren’t working out. Maybe they stop answering your calls, or they find ways to avoid you. Eventually you learn to accept their decision, and you move on. Contact has been broken. We’ve probably all been through it.

Now flash forward to today. Maybe you’re happily married by now, maybe you’ve got a significant other, maybe not. But for some reason, you can’t resist the temptation to look up your old flame online. You can find all sorts of details on their life, if they’re married or dating someone, where they live, what they do, what they find interesting, who they still associate with, etc. You might even go so far as to send a friend invite on Facebook and try to “rekindle” the friendship, which can lead to trouble.

Why do we do it?

Or maybe a better question is: should we do it?

Twenty or thirty years ago, this wouldn’t have been as big of an issue. In order to “catch up” with this person, you’d either have to actually talk to them, or basically stalk them. There wasn’t a whole lot of middle ground. But nowadays, that person is actively posting status updates and information about themselves on the web, almost asking you to stalk them. It’s way to easy to find out information about someone else—even if you’re not friends with them on Facebook. Some how I’ve become an “active non-participant” in so many of my friend’s lives. I don’t talk to them anymore, either online or in real life, but somehow I know that they just had a baby, his name is so-and-so, he’s 7 lb. 12 oz. with black hair and blue eyes, he was born at X hospital, and on and on. I’ve even seen pictures of him online. Should I really know all this about someone I haven’t spoken to in years?

Maybe it’s time we realized that we need to set some online social boundaries. I really like this article posted by one of my friends. It talks mostly about social etiquette and how to be more careful about what we share. I think we should take it a bit further, and perhaps be a bit more careful about how we browse.

We need to put our online lives at a lower priority than then our non-virtual lives. Call or email your friends and let them know what’s going on in your life before you broadcast it on Facebook. Stay away from the more “serious” online discussions — leave that for in-person communication. If you discover that someone is in a tough situation, reach out to them in real life rather than leaving a half-hearted comment online. Don’t forget that online social media is meant to enrich our existing relationships, not replace them.

Don’t get caught in the “social spiderweb.”

Or in other words… why I’m not that excited about Google+.

First thing’s first, Google+ is built very well. It’s use of “Circles” is a very good idea (especially the fact that you don’t have to be following people following you - worst part of Facebook). Plus it has some cool features like “Hangouts” and “Huddles.” I also like the clean design, the way that it integrates with all your existing Google services, and lack of annoying 3rd party applications.

In short, Google+ is basically what I wanted in a social network.

So why don’t I like it?

Because it’s too late in the game to introduce a new social network.

Think about it. Right now I’m juggling Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Tumblr, and the myriad of other small utilities that have a “social” feature. The last thing I need is another network. Facebook is already keeping track of my contacts, Twitter lets me share links and little fun things, LinkedIn is a great professional network, and Tumblr lets me blog.

Where does Google+ fit in?

For me, it really doesn’t. Granted, not everybody is in the same situation as me, but still… I just don’t want to have to worry about managing Google+ alongside everything else. Not to mention that I have to wait for all the cool browser extensions and mobile apps to be developed before I can really use it the way I would want. Oh, and of course, the mobile web version isn’t supported on my phone (but that’s a gripe for another day).

When we cut down to the core of the issue, we find this: the reason I want a social network is for the network. Not the cool features, not really even the privacy concerns, but the network. Because really, it’s all about having that connection to the people I want to reach. Facebook has some cool features, Google+ has some cool features, and Twitter has some cool features, but basically I use them to do the same thing: to connect and share with my network! Unfortunately, I have to rebuild that network every time a new service comes along. This is super ineffective.

Email is genius. I register for an address — doesn’t matter who I register with, could be Google, Yahoo, Windows Live, or even Facebook — and anyone else that has an email address can email me! Doesn’t matter who they register with either, they can still “connect” with me. New email clients are built all the time, and I can switch without breaking links to my existing “network.” Pure genius!

I submit that this is what we need for social networks. Some sort of agreed upon standard for social networks, such that different “registrars” (Google, Facebook, Twitter, etc.) can communicate between each other. That way I can reach my network through Google+, or through Facebook, or through Twitter. Then I just pick my preferred interface, and meanwhile the big companies are competing over a better interface and better services (kinda like they’re already doing).

In the meantime though, I probably won’t be using Google+ very much. Quite frankly, it’s just too much for me.

Ever since I got a data plan with my Palm Pre, I have been a happy camper. I love having the answer to almost any question available right there in my pocket. It has become so useful that it’s basically replaced my laptop and desktop for home computer use. All my social networks are easily accessible, along with email, web, and a host of fun little games. It has kept me entertained for hours and hours.

With a phone that can do so much, you’d think I’d keep in touch more with my friends, right?

Not so much…

It’s not that I don’t keep in touch with them — I do — it’s just different. I’ve found I hardly ever use any of the minutes on my phone. Now, I’ve never been much of a phone person before, but I remember trying to keep myself within 300 anytime minutes on my old phone and struggling. My new plan is better (as far as minutes go), but I’m not sure I’d break my limit even without the unlimited night/weekend minutes. Why?

Because I either text or Facebook stalk or tweet at them.

Apparently it’s not just me either. We are turning more and more towards data usage over actual calls. More towards using the Internet to communicate instead of in-person communication.

There’s always two sides to this issue: It’s a good thing because we are more in touch than ever before, but bad because that type of communication can be pretty impersonal. The good can be pretty convincing though: I can keep up with all my friends that have moved away from Provo in a way I couldn’t before (+1 Internet). If I want to share something with all my friends, it’s easy to do (+1 Internet). Planning and event organizing is simplified (+1 Internet). I could mention several more.

Not being able to actually talk to my friends when I actually see them? Not cool (-10000 Internet).

What is it about being so connected and in touch with each other that inhibits us from being able to actually communicate?

It’s easy for me to forget that the Internet is a tool. Like phones, or old-fashioned letters. They are meant to help us communicate with others, but not for actually replacing them. If we let it, Facebook can quickly define a relationship, instead of supplementing it. Texting becomes the way to communicate instead of a way to communicate. And that warps our perceptions of people. Because too much is hidden by these communication methods.

The bottom line? Sometimes you need to actually visit these people you follow on Twitter or Facebook. Have a non-virtual chat. It’s pretty neat.

(Also, I write stuff like this a lot. Is it getting annoying? Does anybody still read this?)